Jay the Joke

Golf a/k/a Foreplay & Porn Stars

2010-07-25T12:18:21-06:00

A little something for every Hawks’ fan.

Adios Reasoner

2010-07-22T19:05:26-06:00

The Blackhawks have acquired center Jeff Taffe from the Florida Panthers in exchange for center Marty Reasoner.

The end of a lengthy career for this fan favorite Hawk.....

Link

Sharp Not Going Anywhere

2010-07-20T15:32:51-06:00

The full story.

“I told (Patrick Sharp) he can relax, he’s not going anywhere,” (Stan) Bowman said before the premiere of “ Chicago Blackhawks 2010 Stanley Cup Championship” DVD at Navy Pier. “He’s a big part of this. He means a lot to us on the ice and off the ice.”

Canada Hates Toews

2010-07-15T15:19:30-06:00

Among those who have been critical of the honor given Toews is the mother of a soldier killed in Afghanistan. “While it is commendable that Jonathan Toews has accomplished so much in his short life thus far, I feel it is a travesty he has had a lake named after him,” Shirley Seggie said.

Well maybe not “hate”....

Link

Niemi’s Agent Compares Arbitration to OJ’s Trial?

2010-07-15T06:52:56-06:00

Despite Niemi’s impressive showing during the Hawks’ drive to the Stanley Cup championship, Zito said he’d rather not leave it up to an arbitrator to make sure his client gets a nice raise from his salary of $827,000 last season.

“We’re confident we have a good case, but with that said, there is always risk,” Zito said of the unpredictability of a hearing. “It’s just like going to court ... Did O.J. (Simpson) really not do it?”

Yeah, that’s the kind of arguing stuff that will convince the arbitrator to favor your client.

JFC....

Link

For Unclelar

2010-07-11T22:54:37-06:00

He asked, we deliver. When I Googled for hockey boobs I found many fascinating images. These were the only SFW ones.

Remembering Bob Probert

2010-07-11T08:03:00-06:00

‘’It was the first service I’ve ever been to where people wore hockey jerseys,’’ he said. ‘’Scores of them. All with ‘Probert’ on the back, Detroit and Chicago. Some people wore them over their funeral suits.’’

That’s how hockey fans send off their beloved sons.

Telander

Adios Hjalmarsson

2010-07-09T19:06:42-06:00

The Blackhawks’ salary cap difficulties took another hit Friday, as the San Jose Sharks signed defenseman Niklas Hjalmarsson to a four-year, $14 million offer sheet.

The Hawks have seven days to match the offer of $3.5 million per season but with negotiations continuing with fellow restricted free agent goaltender Antti Niemi, the team may have to choose between two players who helped them capture their first Stanley Cup since 1961.

Link

Toews Lake

2010-07-08T14:53:37-06:00

Elliott Harris has all the news you can use.

IT’S NO FISH STORY: Manitoba goal: Call it Toews Lake
Talk about your big fish in a big pond.

Jonathan Toews, captain of the Stanley Cup-champion Blackhawks and Conn Smythe Trophy winner (not to mention a hockey gold medalist for Team Canada in the Olympics), has taken that to another level. Beyond sea level. ‘’Lake’’ would be more precise.

Toews is scheduled to bring the Stanley Cup to his native Winnipeg on Sunday—and be honored, too.

‘’We’re going to name a lake after him,’’ Manitoba Premier Greg Selinger said Wednesday on Canadian radio. ‘’Manitoba has 100,000 lakes. I know Jonathan likes to fish with his dad; he’s been up at Aikens Lake, fishing up there. So we’re going to name a lake after him.’’

Precise location yet to be revealed.

Yahoo! Sports’ Greg Wyshynski asked Dwight Macaulay, chief of protocol for the government of Manitoba, whether it would be Lake Toews or Toews Lake.

‘’Toews Lake,’’ Macaulay said. ‘’Jonathan will receive a map showing exactly where the lake is. ... This is an unnamed lake that will be named after Jonathan Toews forever.’’

Will Toews be able to fish without a license?

‘’I think he’ll need a license,’’ Macaulay said. ‘’But how many people can say they’re fishing in a lake named after them?’’

GAME ON!

2010-07-07T07:29:16-06:00

Kris Versteeg got his day with the Stanley Cup yesterday. So, according to his interview on CSN, he took it home and made it the prize for a street hockey game between all his old friends. How cool is that?

Imagine, you’re one of his friends, you haven’t really seen him in some time due to his career and, suddenly, there he is with the Cup plopped in the middle of the street and he lets you, and everyone else, have some fun with it. Every one of those guys will remember that for the rest of their lives.

No word on which team won the street hockey battle for the Cup.