Adam L. Jahns plays Captain Obvious, but does it well, without the pathos or satire.

The Blackhawks ended up losers in the sweepstakes for winger Zach Parise and defenseman Ryan Suter, the best and most coveted free agents.

So what now?

The American-born 27-year-olds and close friends opted for a dual package, joining the Minnesota Wild on the Fourth of July. Parise left behind the New Jersey Devils and Suter the Nashville Predators as they agreed to 13-year, $98 million contracts.

The Hawks offered contracts to both players but were still on the outside. General manager Stan Bowman said the Hawks made “a very impressive offer” to Parise but knew he was drawn to playing in his home state of Minnesota.

- AND -

So what’s “Plan B”?

It’s no secret Bowman is under pressure from top brass to make the correct changes after consecutive first-round exits. It’s also clear he has been given the OK to add big contracts.

John McDonough really likes Scotty Bowman.

Scotty Bowman really likes his son, Stan.

Rocky will have to fire McDonough before there is a GM change.

McDonough was the guy that convinced every drunk kid to buy a home red #88.

Food for thought.

Blame it on the heat and power outages.

You can only have so many hookers and drugs on hand when these guys come to visit. When the hookers haven’t showered in 3 days and smell like shit, the drugs suck because nobody’s

on the street corners selling the good shit I couldn’t see it going any other way,

They tried sending Toews to to dinner with them to talk X’s and O’s, but all they were intrested in was crack & Ho’s.

Sadly Kaner’s, out if town and they had nobody to party with.

Kaner! cannot afford hookers.

That is why he scours the high schools.

Big Star - 05 July 2012 06:51 PM

Kaner! cannot afford hookers.

That is why he scours the high schools.

Got it. So if the Hawks paid Kaner what he was worth and he could snag hookers then the Hawks would win the Stanley Cup.

Thank God for logic.

BigBadBill - 05 July 2012 07:12 PM

Big Star - 05 July 2012 06:51 PM

Kaner! cannot afford hookers.

That is why he scours the high schools.

Got it. So if the Hawks paid Kaner what he was worth and he could snag hookers then the Hawks would win the Stanley Cup.

Thank God for logic.

Nope.

He blew his dough already on hookers.

Think.

It should be noted that nobody in the NHL wanted to deal for the underachieving alcoholic and his overpaid contract.

NOBODY.

Alfonso Kaner! lives.

Big Star - 06 July 2012 08:12 AM

BigBadBill - 05 July 2012 07:12 PM

Big Star - 05 July 2012 06:51 PM

Kaner! cannot afford hookers.

That is why he scours the high schools.

Got it. So if the Hawks paid Kaner what he was worth and he could snag hookers then the Hawks would win the Stanley Cup.

Thank God for logic.

Nope.

He blew his dough already on hookers.

Think.

So what is it he can or can’t afford hookers?

B3’s logic is sound Kaner needs a RAISE!!!

Big Star - 06 July 2012 08:14 AM

It should be noted that nobody in the NHL wanted to deal for the underachieving alcoholic and his overpaid contract.

NOBODY.

Alfonso Kaner! lives.

The usual gibberish!

Riverman - 06 July 2012 06:23 PM

Big Star - 06 July 2012 08:14 AM

It should be noted that nobody in the NHL wanted to deal for the underachieving alcoholic and his overpaid contract.

NOBODY.

Alfonso Kaner! lives.

The usual gibberish!

The usual know-nothing about hockey retort.