And to think that 5½ months ago, after a 3-8 start, Wallace was looking like an overpriced stiff as he was challenging Skiles on his no-headband rule. While Ben was right in his crusade—why was the marketing department selling the headband-and-hair persona when the coach didn’t want it?—the flap could have exploded if Skiles didn’t quickly diffuse it. Rather than take on Wallace, he finessed him—and the headband hasn’t been seen since. ‘’It really was no big deal,’’ Skiles said. ‘’Ben’s pretty much been a rock all season long, on and off the court.’’

I decided to turn one of the office televisions onto ATH yesterday because of a hunch.

And F***tard delivered, predicting the Pistons will win the series in 7. This amused Reali tremendously who said something like, “Of course you pick the Pistons.”

However, F***tard is too much of a goddamn coward (that is FAG in Venezuelan slang) to actually state this opinion in the F***tard-Times. Rather than actually having the COJONES, COURAGE & CONVICTION to write* what He* may or may not believe, F***tard circumvents the issue by talking about BULLSHIT such as Ben Wallace’s stupid headband and afro. And then F***tard bashes the Bulls sweep of the Heat:

Do not mistake that for self-doubt regarding the mission. It’s just a level-headed warning from a champion and four-time Defensive Player of the Year that the Bulls—no championship rings among them, other than Wallace’s—really haven’t achieved anything yet. The sweep of the defending-champion Heat was as impressive as it was stunning, but the opponent was old and limping while operating on fumes and false bravado.

He* ain’t gonna recapture that Lisagor with that attitude (or will He*)?

It is also amusing that F***tard berates the NBA playoff schedule because of “television” and yet considers $60 million chump change to pay an athlete. Great going F***tard. In case you haven’t heard, gas rates in the Chicago area are climing nearly $0.05 per gallon EVERY DAY this week (at last check in my neighborhood - $3.35/gallon). Insinuating that millions of dollars in salary to one player isn’t a lot of money and then bash the league for how it generates that type of revenue just to pay the athletes is absurd. So what would be F***tard’s alternate economic? Inflate ticket prices like gas?

The F***tard-Times should check the bastard’s expense report while supposedly in Auburn Hills this weekend. I bet F***tard calculates $12/gallon on the car rental. And John Barron is probably stupid enough to approve it.

The F***tard media seem to be against the Bulls in this series. Fuck them and fuck Detroit.

Bulls in 6.

I believe.

Fire the F***tard.

F***tard is a goddamn coward for not writing* His* prediction (Pistons in 7) today as stated on ATH.

Pussy. Fag.

Fire the F***tard.

He actually did write his prediction in yesterday’s paper, saying the same crap over again.

One other thing though, I think the Bulls have “paid” their dues just as much as anyone else still in the playoffs.  To say they don’t deserve to win it this year because they haven’t taken enough “lumps” is another sign of idiocy. 

Anyways FTF!

Wiz,

I think you’re exactly right. I think, that his* opinion comes from the Bulls dynasty. Tthe Bulls made the Eastern Conference finals in the two years preceding the first championship. That’s where the “haven’t paid their dues” attitude comes from. So once again (Tw)"it" digs up the past to use in an idiotic comparison between the Bulls then and now.

All I can say is..."Zzzzt, I’m sorry. Wrong answer. Thank you for playing.”

wizkid - 05 May 2007 08:37 AM

He actually did write his prediction in yesterday’s paper, saying the same crap over again.

I must be blind. I don’t see where F***tard predicts the Pistons in 7 in either yesterday’s dreck or today’s garbage? He* did state this prognostication on ATH yesterday however.

I must be losing it as well. I went and re-read both articles and came up with nothing. Although, a nice flip flop from Friday to Saturday. Friday there was no way to compare these teams to the teams of yore. Saturday, that is pretty much all he did.

I didn’t see a prediction in Friday’s column* either. It could be that was the feeling wizkid got from it.

I guess it is a real no brainer that F***tard would pick the Pistons over the Bulls for no reason other than to be a complete douchebag.

Fire the F***tard.

tyrone briggs - 05 May 2007 09:51 AM

I guess it is a real no brainer that F***tard would pick the Pistons over the Bulls for no reason other than to be a complete douchebag.

Fire the F***tard.

I just figured something out. We all know that the MDF never has anything positive (without reservations) to say about any of Chicago’s sports teams. He* feeds off negative energy, just like the slime in “Ghostbusters II”. I wonder if he* actually played that part in the movie.

Tinky had said during his so-called “vacation” that he would be covering the Kentucky Derby. He’s so obsessed with the Bulls I don’t know if he’ll be able to handle the remote deftly enough to steal sufficient quotes for a story on either.

Thanks, Tyrone, for unmasking the utter cowardice of this MDF. Did he think that nobody was watching ATH and wouldn’t call him out for his prediction?  Look for it to resurface if the Bulls fall behind in the series. That would be more typical Tinky behavior.

Absolutely right, Fred, but only if the Bulls lose a game in this series.

If the rock wins this series and becomes a foundation for an NBA Finals berth, he might even emerge as the hoops hero we’ve been looking for in Chicago since You Know Who. Gordon? An assassin, but quiet. Hinrich? Midwestern, but maddening at times. Deng? The best all-around player and a lovely human being, yet maybe too polite to rule a raucous sports town. Listen to the United Center cheers next week.

Rip one week, praise the next. I am surprised Tinky has any balls left, IF he had any to begin with, the way he sits on the fence and bandwagon jumps. FTF.

Hino2 - 05 May 2007 12:48 PM

If the rock wins this series and becomes a foundation for an NBA Finals berth, he might even emerge as the hoops hero we’ve been looking for in Chicago since You Know Who. Gordon? An assassin, but quiet. Hinrich? Midwestern, but maddening at times. Deng? The best all-around player and a lovely human being, yet maybe too polite to rule a raucous sports town. Listen to the United Center cheers next week.

Rip one week, praise the next. I am surprised Tinky has any balls left, IF he had any to begin with, the way he sits on the fence and bandwagon jumps. FTF.

Here’s the problem. Wallace isn’t going to win this series by himself. That’s what the MDF implies in this colunm*. Maybe Jordan could (because he was a great defender as well as perhaps the best offensive player of all time).

That was an awful game one. F***tard is gonna bash this team senseless tomorrow.

Would someone please inform the Bulls that their next playoff series started Saturday night? They didn’t show up for Game 1, and if they don’t promptly improve their energy level, skill sets, defensive strategy and whatever it is they were doing, this best-of-seven event will be over in three more games. You knew playing the Pistons wouldn’t be another vacation on South Beach, but you also figured the Bulls might be a little more, uh, jazzed for the moment.

F***tard can be such an asshole.

Yes, the Bulls stunk yesterday in the series opener against the Pistons. But to claim that sweeping Miami was some sort of cake walk is an unnecessary cheap shot. Of course we expect nothing else from this douchebag.

Put it this way: Paris Hilton will be more prepared for jail than they were for the opening bell of the Eastern Conference semifinals.

Ah yes, the obligatory spoiled rich stupid whore toss off comment that serves no purpose other than to give Paco a good giggle after performing oral sex on F***tard. Wonderful and hysterical indeed.

Someone will have to explain why Skiles, whose foremost coaching talent is coaxing desire and fire from his players, didn’t have them in a proper mental state to go bowling—much less try to beat the conference favorites inside their loud, gimmicky, decibel-mad Palace of Auburn Hills.

This is perhaps one of the most irritating streaking consistencies in F***tard’s so-called “journalistic work"*. The tendency of calling out individuals under the most ridiculous pretexts and exagerations that invoke Armaggeddon. JFC, it was only one basketball game in a best 7 series. It is not like Scott Skiles no longer remembers how to coach his team. And this defeat, although embarassing, is not the end of the world. A true champion overcomes adversity. This attribute is just one of F***tard’s personality failings. F***tard pouts, goes home and bangs the Wallace blow up doll when things go badly. F***tard overcomes nothing.

The only thing more embarrassing than the score was Skiles’ explanation for the sluggishness and sloppiness.

First he blamed the six-day layoff between games, which might be a reasonable excuse if the Pistons weren’t oozing of energy, hustle, floor burns and all the traits that usually define the Bulls. Maybe the NBA shouldn’t let television priorities erode a team’s edge, but the best coaches manage to overcome such issues.

FLIP-FLOP.

F***tard also ranted and raved about the NBA television schedule. If that is “fair game of an argument"* for F***tard, then why the hell is Skiles being bashed for stating practically the same observation? And the not so subtle insinuation that Skiles is not one of the “best coaches” is laughable, especially after F***tard’s long running love affair of the coach. Normally this is the section of the column* where F***tard regurgitates the never happened infamous “contract renegotiation” between Skiles and Reinsdorf.

But who are we Internet Creatures to question the saintly words of F***tard, even if unsubstantiated from one single accountable source?

Then Skiles, somehow, tried to blame the very nice stories we wrote about his team after the historic sweep of the Miami Heat. What that has to do with a lack of heart and determination, I have no idea. The seasoned playoff coach makes sure newspaper stories don’t infect his team. ‘’They got all the loose balls. They were all over the glass. They were the aggressors,’’ Skiles said. ‘’That’s our calling card. Even if we don’t win, we usually play harder than the opponents. They taught us a lesson. Unfortunately, the good thing was we won a series. But the bad news is, everyone tells our guys how great they are.’’ If I have this straight, the media should have ignored the wonderful breakthrough and continued to doubt and dog the Bulls.

And of course we are reaching the “climax"* of the column* where F***tard wraps up the supposed issue/argument of the day and explains to the minions/readers how “it all gets back to F***tard”. Where in Skiles’ quote is the media even mentioned? Is F***tard that paranoid to assume everything spoken by any Chicago athlete/coach/sports figure is about Himself*?

The vanity and insecurity of this douchebag is boundless.

Fire the F***tard.