Jay is in China. We know that because he brings us wonderful, penetrating, insights into the people and culture and .... oh, who am I kidding? What he brings us is the typical “Ugly American” view of foreign cultures while managing to avoid any real work. Which, come to think of it, is another “Ugly American” stereotype that permeates the world.

I’ve seen some oddities during my days and nights here: a talking golf cart, a Kung Fu exhibition at a chic nightclub, buses and cars that keep driving through crosswalks when pedestrians have the green light, animal penis on menus, an immovable donkey on a back road near the Great Wall, David Schwimmer and Billy Dec schmoozing up the mayor at a Chicago 2016 party and a Japanese judo coach who said this after his powerhouse team underachieved and won only two gold medals: “I have to bear the responsibility, and I think that I should slit my belly to apologize.”

Do you want to be the first to tell him or should I, that those Rocky Mountain Oysters he gets when out west are not actually seafood? Not even a land based relative of shellfish.

Ah, who cares? Clearly his mania with bestial genitalia knows no cultural bounds.

The rest of that non linear collection of random thoughts, glued together by a common lack of substance, would never have seen the light of day at any self respecting High School paper. In other words kids, don’t despair when you fail those “Ethics in Journalism” or “Basic Writing 101” classes, you can always work for the Sun Times.

We also find out, and by “find out” I mean “knew this already,” that Kobe Bryant is popular in China. It has nothing to do with the fact that the Chinese government only allows its citizens to see the NBA and State approved versions of athletes’ lives. It has nothing to do with a sport that is gaining popularity in a new land nor does it have anything to do with the kazillion dollars Nike spends in China promoting the NBA in general and Kobe in particular. No, it is because Yao Ming is too tall.

But nothing has been more shocking than the discovery that Kobe is a bigger sensation than Yao, the famed 7-6 giant who has hoisted China onto the world sports map and symbolized his nation’s basketball boom.

-AND-

After the Germany victory, he was the last one off the court and was serenaded by the audience. But at 7-6, how many people actually can relate to him here?

Yep, those tiny Chinese can’t fathom tall people. Even though Northern China - where Yao is from - boasts a wealth of tall people. Jay wouldn’t know that because, rather than talk to an actual Chinese person, he is still writing about animal penises on the menu.

There are journalists and authors who have written some incredible literature based on cultural observations and the humorous consequences of getting things wrong. Jay is not among them.

There is other stuff that Jay has already written about before. Not a long time ago, just last week. We already have a thread rocking in the forums, so CLICK HERE TO JOIN THE FUN!